Pictures! Am feeling kinda bored and pictures often speak clearer than words..so yeah..


Adidas Airline Original White! Hmm, yeah this is definitely more of a Want than a Need. Not even a Want 'cos I wasnt really in need of a bag..so it was just an impulsive purchase..

Got it from Gil. Haven't start reading it though. Hee.

My current read. :)

Oh this is interesting. Someone posted me sth years back, from the period of 2000 to 2005, but I only knew about it a few days back. I moved, and this post was posted to my old place and it probably got misplaced and the contents are lost.

Hmm, this is the address of the sender but I really dont think I know of anyone staying at Geylang East. So how?

Guess what's this?

Yeah! Tickets to Step's concert! Haha..My 100+ is gone! Sigh..hope it will be good!

Well, another good news to me..My aim of getting 10,000 bucks in my account by the time I graduate might come true after all! Hohoho..yeah 10,000 might not be a lot la, but for someone who has only less than 100 bucks in her account at the start of this year to a few grands at the end of the year..at least this means that I have saved!

"Friends come and go. They don't stay."

People enter and leave your life, and sometimes, it is better to let go of a friend, who doesn't believe in your beliefs anymore.

At least I know that Gil and Dap will be there for me, 24/7 always. I am blessed.

Yes, this post is meant to be refering to someone, but I am afraid to mention her name, for the fear of losing the friendship. As much as I feel that I should let you leave my life, I cant bear to. I have known you since J1..or perhaps J2..I cant remember..and you stood by me all the way in my jc years. I have always believed in you, more than you know I did. I knew that behind that innocent appearance of yours, stood someone that was so mature that it made me feel like I am always so kiddish. It breaks my heart, deeply, to keep myself updated with your life's happenings. Yes, from an outsider's point of view, I saw the drastic change in you. Or perhaps I sense the gradual drift between us, moving so rapidly that I cant seem to catch hold of and make it wait.

But, mentioning you makes me think of myself. I have changed so much that perhaps, you do feel the same about me, too.

It just needs less than a minute to wake up. To wake up from my lala dream and to face reality once again. Welcome back bright warm sunlight, sky blue sky and whatever. lol. At 3:47 am on Saturday morning, I am feeling way good. I hope this feeling will last.


However, Audrey appeared in my dreams. Once last night, once this afternoon. I really wonder why.

xsg,

To me, you are irreplaceable. I know you will be alright.

love,
dmn

There are so much bitterness in me. Time, will fade it off.

Before the world of blogging and msn came into the picture, I guess sms was the way to go.

To the people that comes to my mind and people that are worth mentioning: (not that if you are not mentioned that I dont care about you, just that....probably it slips my mind, I dont want to mention about you, or it can be quite pointless to mention about you 'cos it's not the right mood to do so. )

I remember lying on the same bed, in the year 2001-2002, for most nights, sms-ing away. To whoever I was msging each night. Sometimes it would be Sheena, where I would keep on replying till I eventually fall asleep. Sometimes, it would be Daphne, where those were the days that I just got to know her and we rarely talk that much. And most of the times, we were talking about friendships and life I think. Cant really remember that much. Follow up would be an occasional Guanda, who would bomb me with his lameness. Haha. Hmm, Geraldine sometimes I think, cant really remember much. We drifted apart after JC, which is kinda sad 'cos we were once close, especially in secondary school where we would talk on the phone for hours, till my mum nagged and I have to put down the phone. And the fact that my mum was so strict about phone calls but I still managed to talk to Gel for quite long..It's still very amusing 'cos I think she must have spent alot of time on the phone 'cos she has so many ppl to talk to. :) Daniel is another fellow who would constantly msg me with erm forwarded messages or really corny smses. Let me think..who else..before my laptop's batt runs out..Janice. Not the classmate Janice, but the other one. Janice the pretty guy. Yeah. Was msging each other very frequently for some time. Oh, Sheena was the one that made me hit 2000+ smses in a particular month, and I was scolded by my mum 'cos of that. The scene where Sheena and I were talking about this issue is still vividly in my mind. I remember I was in class and I saw her and yeah...sth like that..another incident was that we spoke on the phone till 4am (i think) and we had to go school in a few hours' time. But we (or at least I,haha) appeared fresh and energised for the day's activities. Yeah, of course many little things of which that I still remember. Next will be Kok Kiong, where those were the days where there would be occasional smses and phone calls from him. Carolyn, hmm..I guess it should be quite frequently, otherwise we wouldn't have been good pals yeah? Yeah now that I remember, there are. And they continued even when she was in UK and where each sms was like 50 cents. Our friendship kinda died down, especially this year. Gillian, I dont recall sms her that often 'cos she's a Hubber, so yeah. OH yah, how can I forget about Chee Ching! Where are you now man! What happen to you?? I miss those days where you would sent me really 'interesting' poems and the occasional smses and rare phone calls. Somehow I remember calling you when I was dead bored at my friend's bbq chalet and you had to talk to me for some time. I didnt know why I called you at that time, but somehow, sad to say, I wont call you if the same thing happen to me right now. So, you better start contacting me again, and please choose smu over nus so that I can have company! Jiamin dearest, I read your last entry. I am sorry that I didnt reply to your sms. Will get back to you real soon, I promise. :) Did we get close only in J2? But yeah I think we didnt sms each other that often in jc? Shireen, same like jiamin, the occasional msges. Hmm, lastly, Kelwin. Yeah, since it's been quite some time, yup I liked him. I think from jc2 to near end of it. I think. Cant really remember. He's one of the few where his smses would make me happy the whole day, sth like that la. And only one of the few where I used to lie on my bed, sms-ing away till I fall asleep. Or sms-ing away while I was studying. Certainly, when you like someone, anything that the person does will automatically makes you happy la. Carolyn once commented that he isnt the type of guy which I would fall head over heels with. Yeah, I agreed. But he's funnily witty. Haha.

I guess this entry started off with me thinking about Kelwin and Sheena and it went a little out of point cos I ended up talking about other not-so-relevant stuff as well. Daphne, thanks for being there, smsing me in the middle of the night, when we were having our A levels, and during my exams this term. Especially for my CEO leadership paper. I know you probably think you didnt do much, but 'cos I had to go out with you, thus 'forcing' me to finish up my paper. LOL.

Of course, how can I end this entry without mentioning you. Dear Gil, thanks for constantly being there, especially this period, which I myself find myself absolutely ridiculous to shut myself up from almost everyone. LOL. I will be back real soon.

And Peiyu, thanks for always being there for me, when I need you. And for not giving up on me, even when I can be rather "off and on" at times. (if you understand, if not nvm. )


Yeah, this entry turns out to be longer than what I wanted it to be. It's like going to be 0530 soon, I really need to sleep man.




Oh yah, I realised I am still living in the past. So, after blogging about this entry, I guess I will feel better and to try to let go of all the stuff..

Right now I am thinking whether I should go and pee and come back and sleep. It's really troublesome to climb down and go and pee and risk the risk of letting my parents know that I am not asleep at this hour where it is also the time where they wake up each day. They are sure to nag at me tomorrow. Oh man, I can hear the birds chriping somewhere miles away man. Damned. I better sleep. To pee or not to pee..

I have lost my focus in life, from the year 2004, May. Or perhaps earlier.

I am alright.

I have thought of many things. Of everything, everyone, things I wish I have done, and things that I wish I have not done so. Familty, relationships and friendships; things that matter to me; etc.

Catching "perhaps love" makes me remember someone. I guess I will still love him, somewhere deep down inside my heart. As cliche as that sounds like; I cannot forget him. Yes, he has appeared and reappeared in my life, and left just like that. But I know I wont forget him. Perhaps I need a couple more years.

Sometimes, I wish that a cry will be as simple and pure as it can be, where you cry 'cos you are feeling pain; you cry 'cos your sister hits you and it hurts; you cry 'cos you are not given a sweet to eat;

and not 'cos you cry 'cos you are feel like crying; 'cos you haven't have a good cry for sometime; or 'cos crying makes you feel better.

I cannot cry.


I am not facing depression.


I am hiding from..myself.


I guess the day when I realise how bad a state I am right now, will be the right time for me to regain my focus.


And I am still waiting for this day to come.

There are a couple of people, who I was once close to. We played, we laughed, we cried, we enjoyed every moment together. But, we are just merely strangers right now.

You were once so close to me.

Sigh.

There are so many things to be done, yet I am so lazy to do them.

I will be getting away to somewhere during this hols. I need a place to breathe properly. Will be contacting all of you when I am back. So sorry if I do not reply or answer your calls. Seeya and till then!

[This is going to be a long entry.]

I AM BACK!

Yeah, after being MIA since last saturday, I am finally back at home! Hee..
So where did I go since sat? I went to Korea for a short holiday! It was real fun and the weather was really good!!

Just kidding. Hee. I didnt go anywhere out of town.

Hmm, sorry to all those who sms-ed me these few days, especially those that I never get to reply to you. Really sorry. My phone is very lagging due to the amount of smses. (yeah I know I need a new phone LOL) + my nokia software cannot seem to work so I cant mass delete smses or send smses via my com. That's explains why I never reply. I am totally not used to pressing buttons that frequently..sorry..

Saturday:
I went to watch "THE DESCENT". I was choosing between this and "Saw 2". I thought "Saw 2" was bad enough, so I decided to go ahead with this. Halfway through the movie, I wished that I had chosen "Saw 2" instead, cos "The Descent" was worse. But I didnt regret watching it. It is really good and it has an open-ended ending. Makes you think whether the "crawlers" really exist, or is it a journey of the mind into madness?

There are some nice gore and good scares. Not only because of some classic horror shock moments, but more due to the haunting atmosphere and the utter loneliness and fear that the characters undergo. Moreover, director and writer Neil Marshall managed to put several subtle layers in the story, so at the end you’re left with some intriguing questions. The title of the movie is also a metaphorical one, referring to the human psyche and the depths people have to go through after and during a horrible tragedy.

Plot: Sarah is recovering after the shock death of her husband in a vehicular accident a year earlier. She joins five other women friends as they travel into Chatooga National Park in the Appalachians to go potholing for a weekend. The group is led by the experienced Juno – but once underground Juno admits that she left has taken them into an unmapped area, wanting them to be the first to discover it, and that she deliberately left no notification of there whereabouts. But as they try to find their way out, they realize that there are a host of creatures down there, creatures that have evolved blind from living in the dark but have ferocious hunting instincts and live on the flesh of animals, including humans. The journey now becomes a nightmare fight for survival.

Hey gil, you are right about the affair. That Juno, was assumed to having an affair with Sarah's husband. I went to read up more on this film. Some mentioned that the whole "cave trip" was an imagination of Sarah's mind. Remember the night before their outing to the cave, Sarah has a dream. In it, she hears her daughter's laughter and when she goes to the window, the pole from the car wreck comes smashing through the glass. Then in the cave, just before she becomes aware of the crawlers, she hears once again her daughter's laugh...it leads her to the tunnel they chose to take.

Follow which, I went to May's place. We (me, Gil and May) got ourselves wasted over some horrible volka. *lol* I really didnt want to drink it. Haha. And we spent the night talking and eventually fell asleep.

Sunday:

I went to Singapore Turf Club! Thanks to Gil, I didnt need to squeeze with the rest of the people as we were situated at the Owner's Lounge! All we had to do was to sip tea and eat chips and watch the race in comfort! The aircon was a little too cold though..hee..

Erm, three of us taking a shot in the turf's club....toilet..lol..

Till then!

I am left with 1 last paper to go. Gonna cramp 14 weeks of lessons into my head in 1 day - tmr. Sometimes, I do question myself about the objective of this. Imagine trying to squeeze everything in your head within a very short span of time, so that you can throw out everything during the examinations. And I bet a week after my paper, I will probably forget everything that I have learnt.

What U = XS, RT = oh no....I cant even remember those formula that I had applied in today's paper. *lol* So it doesnt take a week to forget all these..

Till then!