I could have blamed it on:
- the lack of sleep because I was woken up at 930am
- a heavy heart that was caused by some upsetting matter the previous night
- swollen eye bags
- the heavy downpour
- the lack of sleep because I was woken up at 930am
- a heavy heart that was caused by some upsetting matter the previous night
- swollen eye bags
- the heavy downpour
- the stress/expectations that everyone was giving me
But I know this isn't the case. When everything else fails me, nothing else matters.
I have never been serious about anything. Not even studies. Nothing's really planned. I just go along with the flow. Being swayed here and there. No one cares anyway. Not even when I failed my practical driving test. Not even when I have been spending money like water and having the mentality that money doesn't mean much to me. I am just so so screwed. Not even when I know that I need to slim down a little more but just keep stuffing myself silly with chips. My mum even has to ask me whether I am stressed. Not even, not even, not even. Thousand and one of not evens.
Everyone loves me, but no one really loves me. All I want is for someone to love me for who I am, but where are you? To love me and only me and only only me. But where are you?
At the end of the day, I am just a loser trying to hide in my tiny shelter and away from everyone, away from the dangers out there. This is my only way to seek comfort, in no one but myself. Call me selfish, call me irresponsible. Yes I am. And I don't want to care so much. Please, do not come and find me, for once. Do not try to call me.
But I know this isn't the case. When everything else fails me, nothing else matters.
I have never been serious about anything. Not even studies. Nothing's really planned. I just go along with the flow. Being swayed here and there. No one cares anyway. Not even when I failed my practical driving test. Not even when I have been spending money like water and having the mentality that money doesn't mean much to me. I am just so so screwed. Not even when I know that I need to slim down a little more but just keep stuffing myself silly with chips. My mum even has to ask me whether I am stressed. Not even, not even, not even. Thousand and one of not evens.
Everyone loves me, but no one really loves me. All I want is for someone to love me for who I am, but where are you? To love me and only me and only only me. But where are you?
At the end of the day, I am just a loser trying to hide in my tiny shelter and away from everyone, away from the dangers out there. This is my only way to seek comfort, in no one but myself. Call me selfish, call me irresponsible. Yes I am. And I don't want to care so much. Please, do not come and find me, for once. Do not try to call me.
I know who are those who care. So please please do not console me or do anything to cheer me up.
I will be okay. As usual.
