Hmm, yup this will be my last entry.
I guess depression is after all, a very scary thing.
You dont know when you start to sink into it.
But you know the easiest way out is to end it off.
How?
By just disappearing from this world.
Who will cry if I am gone?
University years -4 years, moves very slowly.
It is the period where, I feel that I need to be somewhere else, to do something else.
And not here, wasting my time.
Urges of quitting school, are getting stronger and appearing more frequently.
It is the impulsiveness to do, something else.
To not waste my youth on studying.
How old will I be when I get my degree?
Twenty-three?
And what will I do after that?
Of course there are times, when I feel that I should talk to you.
But I dont want to scare you off.
With my thoughts.
My thoughts of committing suicide for example.
How would you understand me?
When you dont even know me at all?
Probably cos there wasnt a chance to do so in the first place.
My heart aches a lot.
These few days.
No, I had a good and happy chinese new year.
But when the night comes,
I sink into someone else.
I am very upset, even though you dont even know me.
Even though you are gone since 2003.
That's 3 years.
So I guess, people that knew you, their pain will be greater.
What have I become these days?
Farewell. :D
