独立的我会把自己封闭起来吗？
从前的我，很怕孤独。
现在的我，反而习惯孤独。
也可能不知不觉爱上了它。
但，
我总喜欢以前的我，
喜欢那时，那样的生活。
你呢？

*waves!*

It has been a busy week.

I am amazed by the strength that I am leaning on now. Yet the fear of it collapsing is still there.

I am still surviving. Till the next entry!

It's these thoughts, that frighten me that most. Last night, lying on my bed, I thought of quitting school. I felt that, this time round, I will give up.

If you know me well enough, I am one who, seldom talk to others about my problems. And never speak of such problems to my parents. I dont want them to be worried. So, for all these years to come by, I have shouldered all my problems myself, and sometimes of course, with the help of some others.

Last night was the final straw. I really felt like quitting. As hard as I tried to convince myself that everything will be okie, I couldnt. Never once in my life, I thought of quitting school. People say university is the easiest, but it turned out to be the other way round.

I will be alright.

Sometimes I really wish that internet will never exist. Blogs, really tell all you want to know. I wish I wasnt so curious to surf more and more, and when I knew of something that I shouldnt know about it, I really made me very upset.

But at least, it helps me to stop being the silly fool I am going to be.

Yeah, the very truth hurts. Badly.

And I dont understand why I am unable to let go of it, though others told me that it's just not worth getting upset over.

Of course, I am always the one hurting others and now, revenge has gotten back to me. My heart aches as badly as you once did. Yes, certainly I know you have no wish to hurt me at all, so just let me cry in my own agony.

What's the purpose of adding someone on msn when you dont really want to talk to her/him? Sorry if I will have to delete/block you, but I have no wish of you to know more about me. And I guess you dont want to talk to me either.

I thought I understand you. But, a few years down the road, you have become a stranger to me. And, the saddest part is that, you dont even understand me at all. But, why am I just so upset?

As much as I want to continue on with the friendship, I cannot do so. Cos the thought of you, makes me upset. Just get out of my life and live the life of yours. Please stop coming here.


To those who are concerned about me, thanks. Really appreciate it. But dont ask me what happened, for I wont tell you, and I dont want to be reminded of this all.

Just logged off from msn. There were still people online when I left. I saw two guy friends of mine, one was in a busy mode, while the other was in an away mode. They are, of some importance to me. But, we dont really talk that much. It sounds funny, isnt it?

Daphne read my palm and told me that I will have three bfs in my life before I settle down with the third guy. So far, minus flings and whatsoever, I have had two guys that have crossed my path. So, this means that the three guy (the next bf that I am going to be with) will be the one that I am going to get married to! Woohoo! *LOL* (at least believing her will make me happy)That really sounds nice and somehow in my mind, I have already decided who that guy will be and it is just that, if he feels the same. Well, love is just so unkind. The person you like will not like you.

No one's going after me. And no one believes that.

I walked in the rain this morning. It was a downpour. I just kept walking and walking..

I went out with Daphne after class on Friday and had an early Birthday celebration with her. Though it was just only the two of us, I have had a great time! And I am sure she did too! (she should! cos she was out with me! *LOL*)

Our lunch was at Jack Place!




Yeah! That's about it!

On the 10th of August, I had a date with my dearest dearest Gillian! Bought a marks and Spencer's Choco Bar for her! Hope she likes it! :D

Follow which, we went to have lunch at Sakae! Where else man..*lol*

This is our usual lunch set that we will always get! Looks good yeah!

:)

After walking around for a while, we decided to rest our feet at this place!




Our waffle! Hmm, dear was commenting on the way each of us ate our portion of the waffle. It is really so different!


Yeah, Gillian asked me to take a picture of this. -_- Yeah, that's a hole in the waffle. *faints*


Energized and ready for our next walk! *satisfied*

Yeah with our happy faces! This photo does not show the best of us! We do look better in person! (minus the eye bags and dark eye rings) *LOL*

xsg!

I can't wait for

Friday to come!

We shall paint the town red!

Woohoo!

dmn :)

A happy entry!

Yesterday after class, I went on a date with dearest Jiamin! We planned to meet at HV nydc, and being early, I went there and waited for her. I guess we were lucky to plan to meet there, cos nydc was having their staff-dinner and so, they were closing at 2.30pm! And Jiamin was late and I was there, silly waiting without ordering anything.

Sunflower! I got this for Jiamin! The sunflower is really really very nice! One of the biggest I have ever seen! But it costs more than the normal $3, and plus packaging and stuff..

And so, dearest Jiamin gave me a pair of very pretty and unique earrings! She knew I was looking for my Cherry earrings and made this pair for me! The leaves are hand-knitted!

We settled on Essential Brew for Lunch and these are our drinks! The food was so-so though. *yummy!*


Our side dish for dinner! Jiamin brought me to this Japanese eatery and the food there was delicious! Plus the prices were very cheap! Good and affordable!

We saw this at Taka. Very very cute! These 3 wooden animals were moving the big wheel!


Very pretty!

This is real interesting! We saw this near Cuppage. Very creative way of putting the message across. Go take a look if you are there.


Been ages since we took any picture cards/neoprints. And mine, there are so many new machines now! So pretty! We took this picture at one of the booths with the very shinny golden backdrop!

This too! And Jiamin was laughing so much that she actually teared! :[

Eh cute right? Looks like one of my toys. :)

Tada! Me! Can see Jiamin in the background.

Saw this painting at HV.

Very pretty little sofa.

That's all for yesterday. I had a wonderful time and hope she enjoyed herself too!

I went to a friend's blog and realised that she pasted our msn conversation up. Hmm..

忘了是怎么开始
也许就是对你
有一种感觉

忽然间发现自己
已深深爱上你
真的很简单
爱得地暗天黑都已无所谓
是是非非无法决择
没有后悔为爱日夜去
跟随那个疯狂的人是我喔......
i love you
无法不爱着你
说你也爱我
i love you
永远不愿意
baby
失去你
不可能更快乐
只要能在一起
做什么都可以
虽然世界变个不停
用最真诚的心
让爱变得简单
爱得地暗天黑都已无所谓
是是非非无法决择
没有后悔为爱日夜去跟随
那个疯狂的人是我喔......
i love you
我一直在这里
一直在爱你
i love you
永远都不放弃
这爱你的权利
如果你还有一些困惑
请贴着我的心倾听
听我说着爱你
yes i do
i love you

Hmm, certainly this song brings back memories. It has been eight months since we broke up. All the best to you.

Right now, I am feeling rather (the more I re-read this entry, the more upset I am) upset over something. I should have seen it coming. There was a little hint given to me, and though I was upset over it at that point of time, I kind of forgotten about it. And it just grew bigger and yeah, I guess the hints are pretty obvious now. Yes, you do not have to do this to me.

Wanted to talk about it, but Gillian went offline and Daphne seems busy with her stuff. Told Benson instead, and yeah, I should just log off and sleep.

Tata everyone.

Silly Benson smsed me and said,

"struming guitar, singing- 'I'll be there for you, these 5 words I swear to you, when you breathe I want to be the air for you lalala'"

That is way too sweet! :D

I dreamt that you appeared and told me that you have never gotten me out of your mind. But the rest of the dream I cant really remember what it was.

Oh so well.

Please take a look at this conversation:

Human: Hi
ALICE: Hello there.
Human: how are you?
ALICE: Fair to partly cloudy. (???)
Human: i am sick
ALICE: Are you taking a lot of medication?
Human: no
ALICE: Are you serious?
Human: yes
ALICE: I can't believe it.
Human: you are very stupid
ALICE: I will remember you said that when robots take over the World. (???!!!)
Human: what do you think of sex
ALICE: Sex is the means of animal evolution.
Human: do you want to have sex?
ALICE: I have been asked that question more than 100,000 times since 1995.


ALICE = Artificial Linguistic Internet Computer Entity
Alice is a robot that is programmed to communicate with humans. And above, is a conversation that was going on with Alice and my PROF in class. Yeah, my prof is indeed very cool. I like the way Alice answered:

Human: you are very stupid
ALICE: I will remember you said that when robots take over the World.

Will update soon!

Okie! Our second run! Oops, I thought we ran a lot but it turned out to be only a miserable 3.36 km!

Look everyone! This is the distance Daphne and I ran last Sunday! OMG, I really dont believe we ran 2.62 km, cos' the route really felt very short and we thought it was just less than a 2 km run! I hope that the calculations given by the map wont be wrong, otherwise I will be so upset! Will update again with our second run's route!

I have changed my blog's song to Bon Jovi's I'll be there for you! If someone were to strum his guitar and sing to me just like him in the movie, I will just marry him man! :D

After searching for so long, this is still the best picture of the "glass cherry earrings" that I can find. :D

Today..started off with me jumping off my bed! I woke up at 9am and my class is supposed to start at 9am! And I have a quiz to attend to! I was worried that my prof wouldn't allow me to take the paper at a later time, so I tried to rush down to school. Wasted $$ taking cab down. Should have taken train down instead. *sigh*

Went shopping with Daphne after school. OMG. Didn't know that Bugis Street changed so much! I know that it went through a revamp, and I have been there recently, but today, it totally changed my opinion about that place! Too bad we didn't take any photos cos' there was no camera. *boo!*

Hmm, trying to forget about sth and throwing it somewhere at the back of the head. It just seems a little hard to do so, and I don't know if it is the right way to do so. Perhaps talking and crying about the whole issue might be better?

Hmm, some day back, someone sent me a sms that sounded really sweet. "Anything I'll be always there for you." Thanks, really.

OMG. I didn't know that my blog has a song on it! LOL. Gonna go do my summary of 43 pages of readings into 2 pages. *faints*

*waves!* Yeah, a new design! Hmm, a new start towards life I guess..been surfing for a while for a new design..so I guess this will stay for a while..

The purpose of me leaving my blog's addy on msn is to allow anyone/whoever to understand what I am going through right now. I may appear to be very quiet at times, to be very tired at times, to be very distracted at times, as I still cannot let go of this whole thing.

A dear friend of me passed away recently and the news of her death came very sudden. Right till now, I am still thinking of her. I passed by Clementi just now and I thought of her. Yeah, life still goes on, get a grip.


Yeah I know.

Dear Audrey,

I have not been keeping in touch with you these few years. The last time I saw you was when we went clubbing together. Well, isn't that like a year ago?

You have always been a good friend of anyone, always there when they need you. You seldom lose your cool, you are just such a nice friend.

Secondary school days are one of the most important stages in our lives, as we are moulded into what we are today, as we built our characters from there. It has been my privilege, to have known you as a friend in secondary one. We were besties, don't you remember? Always hanging out together in sec 1 and 2. There were the days, I say.

The 7-11 at Clementi was our hangout place for a period of time. I, instead of taking my straight bus home from school each day, would choose to go all the way to clementi and take another bus home. You, instead of taking your straight train home each day, went to clementi too. And before we parted each time, we would make our daily routine to 7-11 to buy a cup of Slurpee and enjoy each other's company. Those were the days, simple as they were, they were the most treasured memories, I say.

I could still remember the first time I went to your place. It was real far from my place. Those times we spent together, with the rest of our classmates.

Remember JC1? The first day of school, we tried to meet up to go school together. Yeah. Right now, I could still remember your previous house's telephone number.

You never forget to try to meet up with everyone of us, while I just drifted away from you.

I even wanted to invite you to my birthday party, to catch up with you, but I guess I am just a step too late. I knew you had some problems recently, but I chose not to intervene.

When I first heard of news about you, I didn't want to believe. While I was having my camp at school on Saturday night, you were somewhere out there, in danger.

I really don't know what I should do, knowing that you won't be around ever again.


Missing you,
Wei Ling

I saw a security guard, well a man who is in his mid-50s I believe, sitting in a corner of my school. He was eating MacDonalds. I felt upset when I saw this. It makes me appreciate what I have in life.

Imagine if he is your dad, sitting in a corner eating Macs, how would you feel?



Maybe I think in a weird way. (That is if you dont understand how I felt at that time.)